Overbooked and Underpaid: Notes from a Yes-aholic

Bed Warmers

I have a bad back.

I also have a bad neck, bad knees, bad shoulders and I get killer headaches. Not exactly migraines, but close.

And the remedy I use over all others for all these aches and pains is a homemade hot pack. You can buy them at pharmacies - they're called all sorts of things, including Bed Buddies. But you can also make your own. It's cheaper and it's easy. And it's a great way to reuse old towels or washcloths and that unmatched sock.

I've used both rice and lentils and have had much better success with lentils.

For a long warmer that you can place around your neck, use a good sized tube sock and 2-3 pounds of uncooked lentils. Simply pour the lentils into the sock and sew up the end (make sure there are no holes in the sock!). Or, if you have no sewing materials handy, just put a knot in the end of the sock.

For a bigger warmer that lies flat enough to put behind your back, take an old dish towel or hand towel, fold it in half and sew around the sides. Leave an opening about 4 inches long into which you can pour the lentils and then fill the cavity with 4-6 pounds of lentils, depending on the size of the towel.

To use, place the lentil stuffed bag or sock into the microwave for a couple of minutes. Microwave power varies greatly from one oven to the next so you will need to experiment with the precise time to heat your bed warmer properly. I would start with 2 minutes, take the bag/sock out and shake the lentils around, and then continue heating in 1-2 minute intervals until you have the desired warmth.

Caution! Never leave one of these unattended in the microwave for more than 4 minutes of heating time, as overheating can scorch the lentils and the fabric. And always use cotton towels - not polyester.

We once stayed in a wonderful rustic stone cabin with no heat source but a fireplace. But, there was a small kitchen with a microwave, so I ran out to the local store and bought lentils. I then used some of the kids extra socks to make each person a bed warmer. The temperature in the cabin was around 40 degrees at night but, between the fireplace, the quilts, and the bed warmers, we were toasty!

Goodwill and St. Vincent de Paul - Underpaid Mecca

 

     

 
 
I started shopping at thrift stores when my first two kids were about 1 and 4.

 

I don't know about your children. Maybe you have demure little tykes that sit quietly. They don't crawl around on their hands and knees, don't jump in puddles, don't spill grape juice down their fronts or throw spaghetti at each other or have mud fights. Goodie for you.

My first two children were a couple of very active boys and it became crystal clear that they had no invested interest in keeping their garments free of stains or holes. And, being underpaid as I am, my clothing budget has always been about, well, the word shoestring comes to mind.

(I'm always stunned at those magazine articles - you know the ones - about "how one family spends their money" and they list their monthly clothing budget at $600.00. What are they wearing? Platinum? I'm lucky if I can spend $1000.00 a year. And that's for 5 of us.)

Anyway, I figured if my kids were going to view their clothing as disposable, then I needed to view it that way too. And there was no way on earth I could do that for $20-$40 a pop for jeans and tee shirts.

Enter thrift stores.

Read the rest of this story....

Bargain Hunting - Estate Sales vs Garage Sales

 

I am not the first person to offer advice on shopping at garage sales and estate sales, and I will certainly not be the last. What I bring to the table is over 25 years of actual sale hounding rather than a quick interview with a few sale hounds. The following are the things I've learned since that first time I went to an estate sale and thought you could just waltz right in.

 

(Note that these are "in person" sales as opposed to the internet. Great as ebay and Craig's List are, I swear by seeing items in person. Especially when it comes to something like a bicycle that needs to be in good working order.)

Garage sale: run by an individual out of their garage. Almost always cash only. Haggling is generally an option.

Yard sale: same as a garage sale - except it's in the yard or driveway. (I know this is a no brainer but I'm trying to be thorough.)

These are generally my least favorite type of sale due to the enormous amount of junk one has to go through to find the good stuff. The seller often has an inflated idea of what his/her possessions are actually worth and, while a seller will often haggle, you can feel the resentment when you don't automatically pay the asking price.

What they are good for: 

Children's clothes, especially play clothes or very, very dressy clothes. This is your best source for adorable little dresses or baby outfits that were only worn once or twice. At the right kind of garage sale you can find quality name brands like Hannah Andersson, Land's End, or Gap.

Children's toys. There are oceans of plastic toys out there and garage sales are the mother lode.

Knick knacks that are your particular taste (if you collect something like pigs or cows, for example) but are not particularly valuable. These days it is very easy for the seller to look up an item on the internet and, if they find it is at all valuable, they will most likely try to sell it on ebay.

Cheap jigsaw puzzles. If you love to do jigsaw puzzles but hate paying full price (Springbok puzzles are anywhere from $14 to $25 these days) then garage sales are a great source.

Used Furniture. Very used furniture. Definitely buyer beware.

Bicycles and fitness equipment. This is one area where I swear by garage sales. Very often, for under $60 you can get a really good quality used bicycle. And I find that most bikes made in the last 15 years are not very well made. My son and I each have garage sale Shwinn's that were made in the 70's when they were really solid.

Drawbacks:

As I've already mentioned, the chances finding things that are truly valuable or collectible that will be marked cheaply are dwindling yearly as sellers use the internet for both determining value and auctioning through ebay.

Rules: Very few except park respectfully and honor the seller's policy on early birds.

The prevailing aura of a garage sale is one of disposability. By this I mean that the things that people choose to sell at a garage sale are often 1) things they never use and want to get rid of 2) things other people gave them as gifts that were never their taste that want to get rid of 3) things that are taking up too much space in their house that they want to get rid off 4) stuff that they know is crap that they want to get rid off, and they want to see if anyone will bite and give them any money for it.

Sensing a pattern here? Garage sales are full of things people don't want.

 

Rummage sale: almost any kind of sale can be referred to as a rummage sale. Most often it is a sale that is composed of more than one contributor, as are church rummage sales. It can also be run by a group of neighbors or a charitable organization. Another sale that is almost always cash only. Haggling can be very difficult at a rummage sale in that you are often only speaking to a sale volunteer and not the actual seller.

Rummage sales are really a mixed bag. When they consist of a neighborhood just pooling their resources, they are almost exactly like large garage sales. But when they are run by a church or other group as a fundraiser, you can find some really great stuff. This is because people will often donate higher quality items in hopes that the charity will raise as much money as possible.

What they are good for: Basically all the same things as garage sales but with the addition of costume jewelry. When women want to get rid of jewelry they no longer wear, they are more likely to send it to a church rummage sale than almost any other venue. Even thrift stores come in second to a good rummage sale in this department.

Bonus: Unlike garage sales, you do find the occasional valuable item. The donor often doesn't take the time to research the value of their item and the volunteers running the sale frequently don't either.

Drawbacks:

As I mentioned earlier, haggling can be difficult at a rummage sale because no one is exactly "in charge" and able to make a decision about lowering a price. I have only been able to haggle over furniture or an appliance and then only if I can point to a visible defect. One other problem with rummage sales is that, sometimes, you get donors who just are too lazy to haul their useless stuff off to the dump so they give it to the church to deal with instead.

Rules: almost none

 

Estate sale: unlike garage and yard sales, a true estate sale is run by a professional liquidating company. It will generally, but not always, consist of an entire household of property and be conducted inside the home and garage of the owner. Haggling is not generally encouraged, rather there are bid slips for large ticket items. Many estate sales take credit cards and the almost all take personal checks with proper ID.

These are my all time favorite sales but they are also the most time consuming. Probably 70% of the stuff in my house came from estate sales. 

What they are good for: Truly high quality goods of almost any description. Remember how I said that garage sales are for things people don't want anymore? Well, estate sales are the complete opposite of that. Usually an estate sale is being held because either someone died, or else they went into a nursing home. Consequently, the sale is to liquidate almost their entire household. This means, not only things the person didn't want to get rid of, but often, their most prized possessions. The ones they took care of and saved for years and years. 

This is where you shop if you are looking for things like high quality furniture, collectibles, or small appliances. Estate sales are also an excellent source for crafting supplies, full sets of china, linens and works of art.

Mind you, one person's valued object can still be another person's useless crap and estate sales at their worst can be a journey through oceans of packratlike junk.

Drawbacks: You can spend several hours waiting to get in to a good sale and all estate sale companies are not created equal. Over the years I have learned which companies sales to avoid because they either price their objects unrealistically high, don't take the time to throw out the stuff that truly is junk, don't clean up and price every item, or are flat out unscrupulous. 

An example of flagrant unscrupulousness: A pin and earrings set for sale for $85 dollars. The earrings are marked Eisenberg, the pin is not. In a separate display case, for $80, is the pin marked Eisenberg that obviously matches the earrings. This dealer is trying to maximize his profit by splitting up the set and misrepresenting the first pin. Could it be an honest mistake? Yes, except that, when I pointed the situation out to the dealer, he acted very surprised, said he'd look into it, and - when he was sure I was no longer watching (which I actually was) he put it right back the way it had been. When I confronted him later, he said dismissively "Oh, the lady who will probably buy that will want all the pieces anyway."

I never went to one of his sales again.

Biggest Drawback: The Rules

Because the stakes can be so high, there are a lot of rules of conduct.

The rules can also vary according to region. I'm going to detail how things work in my neck of the woods.

Most important rule: Numbers!

Almost any sale run by a professional company will require a number to get in. They provide a number or numbered ticket to each person as they arrive and then you wait for them to call your number. This can take a couple of hours so you should bring something else to do while you wait. 

Important notes about numbers:

1) You need to remain within earshot of the person calling the numbers. If you don't hear them call your number, they will pass you over and go to the next number. At which point, when you come back, you will have to get a different number and go to the back of the line again. This can be particularly irritating if the sale is taking place on a bitterly cold day and you went back to your car to keep from freezing. My advice is to dress warm!

2) You generally need a separate number for each person in your party. Don't count on being able to take your spouse or your child in with you if you don't have a number for each of them.

3) There are almost always something called Pre Numbers or Line Up Numbers and this is where things can get dicey. 

What is a line up number? 

It is the number you get from a regular person before you get a number from the official person running the sale.

Huh?

When you read an estate sale notice in the paper or on the internet, it will almost always say something like "Sale from 9:00-3:00, numbers at 8:00" Some companies go so far as to say "Our numbers at 8:00". 

So a lot of estate sale rookies take that at face value and show up at 8:00 only to find that they are already number 85. 

How is this possible? The paper said numbers at 8:00!

This is the point at which they get irritated and you can't always rule out the possibility of violence.

The irony is that the line up number is designed to expressly cut down on the possibility of violence. Think about it - you arrive at a sale which, thanks to the ad, you know has the Lionel Commodore Vanderbilt locomotive you've been looking for for 8 years, and try to get a number at the precise time that 45 other Lionel collectors are trying to get a number. 

It would be chaos. A free-for-all.

Instead the way that works better is to have a system that is truly "first come, first served". How it usually works is, whoever arrives first has their own set of numbers. This person may arrive at the sale site as early as 4:00 a.m. and will most often be sitting in their car. They then hand their homemade numbers out to all the other people that show up after them. This goes on until about 10 minutes before the official numbers are handed out. At which point those with prenumbers begin to line up by the door in a semi orderly fashion and then exchange the homemade number for an official one.

An extra rule about pre numbers - some communities are very strict about the pre numbers - once you have one you may not leave the premises to go somewhere for coffee or the like. The whole point is that you are holding your real place in line. It's just that you can sit in your car instead of standing on the lawn for 3 hours.

Other rules:

Children are generally welcome if they are older and well behaved. If children are not allowed at a sale, it will almost always be made clear in the advertisement. Many of these sales have large quantities of glassware and other fragile objects in what can be fairly close quarters so be careful when bringing children. Remember - you break it, you bought it.

Transportation of large objects is the sole responsibility of the buyer.

No haggling - items over $35 will almost always have what is called a bid slip. You can bid any amount you wish. If yours is the winning bid, the seller will call you after the sale closes and you can pick up your item.

All items are sold as is - buyer beware.

Tips: 

If you see something you like - grab it! You can usually start a pile of the things you are planning to buy and stash it near the check out table. If you change your mind about something, you can always put it back later but you can't wrench it out of the hot little hands of someone else.

Get to know the companies running the sales and engage them in conversation. As you go to more sales and they get to know you, you can often quietly ask which room the item you are seeking is in. This was crucial the time I was there to buy toy trains for my husband and knew there were train dealers there. I was able to get in with the first wave of  people and go right to the items I wanted and claim them.

Either go very early or go very late. If you saw something advertised in the sale that you really, really want, get your tail up in the wee hours of the morning, take a thermos of coffee and a book and camp out so that you will be one of the first ones in. Depending on the size of the house, you must generally be under number 25 to get in within the first hour. Or, if your main objective is to get a great deal - go after noon on the second day when everything is marked half off. Or, do both - if you saw something you liked the first day but didn't want to write up a bid and didn't want to pay full price, go back the second day. But remember - the quality items will often get snapped up by folks not afraid to pay the original asking price.

Get to know the dealers - don't waste your time attending sloppy unprofessional sales. Likewise, keep in mind the dealers you like. A good estate sale company will care less about getting top dollar for something and more about simply selling it. When you find a company that puts reasonable prices on things, make it a point to attend their sales.

Know your items! If you have difficulty seeing up close - take a pair of reading glasses, a magnifying glass or even a loupe. The more you know about what you wish to buy, the more likely you'll know a deal when you see one.

Be prepared to pay full prize if the object is a particularly unusual or valuable one and remember that an antique dealer will only pay as much for an object as he/she can while still marking it up for resale.

Stick to your budget! Yes, I know this contradicts what I said about being willing to pay full price, but a person can get royally carried away estate sales - if you have a fixed budget, go in with cash and stop when you run out.

And I have two very important rules for my own shopping - the items in question must have a place and a purpose. Meaning, I have to have room to store it and I have to be able to use it. This has saved me from buying scads of things that were "oh so cute" but would turn in to "oh so much clutter."

Wrap up:

You have probably figured out by now that I am passionate about estate sales. I almost never even bother with garage sales now that my children are older and I no longer need cheap clothes and toys. I love that the items in estate sales have usually been so well taken care of. I sometimes think of it like adopting a kitten. I am adopting a tablecloth. I am keeping it out of the landfill and adding it to my list of cherished possessions so that it can live on. And when I buy something that is obviously handmade, I feel particularly good for having kept it alive.

Yes, estate sales are a lot of work and I invest a pretty big chunk of a Saturday when I decide to go to one. But for me it is totally worth it. 

Happy hunting!

P.S - Pictures of some of my best finds.

 

Bargain Dinner

 

My husband and I feel very, very strongly about having the family sit down to dinner together as many nights a week as possible and also not to feed the kids processed foods like budget gourmet and we have done pretty well making it happen for 19 years. 

But somewhere along the line I started to lose it when it came to planning and executing dinner. You know something is wrong when your kids balk at pizza  - frozen or otherwise. I think we were maybe getting to the point where I threw one in the oven three nights a week.

My husband, noticing the slide away from home cooked food, quickly stepped in and started cooking dinner at least three or four times a week. 

At first, I was just tremendously relieved. I mean, I really do like to cook, but I had put in 19 years and I think I was burned out. 

It wasn't the cooking that got to me but the planning. I was just so tired of having to figure out what on earth to make each night. Sure, the kids would probably have happily lived on spaghetti six nights out of seven, but I was more ambitious than that.

Now that some time has passed with my husband doing the lion's share of the cooking, I can see there is something deeper at work here than mere burnout. We view cooking from completely different perspectives. 

I see cooking as something that interferes with all the things I'd rather be doing. When I'm cooking, I'm not knitting, reading, making art, practicing harp, or even spending time with the kids. (Except for the occasions where they help me cook.)

When he's cooking he is actually playing hooky from all the things he'd rather not be doing. Cooking is a kind of therapy for him that he can lose himself in, whereas for me, it feels like a prison.

Unless I'm making dessert.

Totally different.

I love to bake or make practically any kind of dessert at all.

But I don't very often.

Because I also love to eat the dessert.

Anyway - tonight was one of those overbooked nights where neither one of us really had time to cook - but we don't have a huge food budget either - so I happily introduce to you one of our favorite "almost feels like home made food" cheap, quick dinners.

 

    

 Voila! The grocery store rotisserie chicken (anywhere from 5.99 - 6.99 depending on whether or not it's on sale) and the take and bake bread (1.29-1.89) (add another .50 for butter or 1.00 for cheese to go with the bread)

Believe it or not, this actually feeds our whole family of five for under ten dollars.

And we throw the carcass into the stockpot afterwards. It makes a terrific stock for chicken and noodles later in the week - an even cheaper dinner - so we often wind up spending about twelve or fourteen dollars total for two dinners.

And, when you're overbooked and underpaid, that sounds pretty good.

Bon Appetit!

Save

Save

Curb Combing With " Phoebe"

Rescued, repainted curb find

 

 

I'm a curb comber. 

Yep - the secret to my decorating style is out. I love to grab stuff off the curb.

If you came to my house you might find yourself describing it as "eclectic". Which is a fancy word for "nothing matches". Well, that's not exactly true - I mean it’s not a higgledy piggledy mess or anything. I'd like to think everything looks as though it belongs together.

OK, belongs might be a stretch. I'd like to think everything "works" together.

I lovingly refer to my style as "stuff from dead people". Almost everything I own came from either my dead relatives or someone else's via estate sales, St Vincent de Paul or the curb.

To date, I have bought exactly one couch, two wing chairs, and a variety of mattresses that were brand spanking new. Everything else - dead people.

Well - I guess some of them aren't dead. They maybe just cleared out a room.

But many of them are dead.

I don't sweat it.

So, earlier this week I was driving along my street and there on the curb was this oak pedestal table with an enormous pedestal foot and one leaf in it.

I was driving the two door sedan and not the Mini-Van.

Dammit!

I got out and gave it a once over.

Not great as it was, but some terrific potential if I painted it. But I didn't really have time in my schedule to go fetch the van. And, honestly, my house is getting too full and I don't even know where I could stash the thing until I could get to refinishing or painting it.

I said my goodbyes and drove off.

But it nagged.

Now the only person I know who has more "projects" sitting around her house optimistically awaiting their facelifts is my friend "Phoebe". (Not her real name - she has requested anonymity which I will surely honor.)

Phoebe's garage and basement are a testament to yes-aholic optimism. We're all sure we'll fit everything in somehow, somewhere, someday, aren't we? I mean that's the yes-aholic manifesto "I can do it - I'll fit it in somehow!".

So I found myself talking to Phoebe at 10:00 on the night of the table incident.

"I thought of you today, there was this oak pedestal table on the street and - "

"Is it still there?!!!!!'

"I don't know - probably - it was still there at five this afternoon with a bunch of other stuff piled on it - "

"Let's go get it!!!!"

"Now?!"

"Yeah - it'll only take 15 minutes - come on!!!"

Good as her word - 3 minutes later she was at my house with her van. (Habitually late for concerts and appointments Phoebe can really hustle when there's free furniture involved...)

Which is how I found myself, in the dead of night, beset by mosquitoes, taking boxes and a microwave and other sundries off of said table to get a better look at it.

"Oh, darn it! It's got a fluted edge!"

"This is a problem?"

"Yeah, I hate that kind of edge. And look - it's not old."

"Well, no, probably from the 70s - but it's still solid oak...."

"No - I'm going to pass. It kills me to leave it here for the garbage man though - who does that, I mean couldn't they at least take it over to St. Vincent's?"

"Well, we could toss it into your van and you could take it over tomorrow..."

And then my friend, the confirmed yes-aholic, took the first steps to recovery.

She said no. 

This was such a personal achievement on her part that I decided to let the fact that we were going to let the garbage men take the table slide.

Besides - there were other headlights slowing down - chances are the table didn't last until morning!

Here are pics of some of my previous curb rescues - some I refinished, some I didn't, some are still waiting. Because somehow, someday - I'll get to them.

I swear.

 

Someone's old built-in linen cupboard

 

Fabulous old trunk that seems like rusted metal - I lacquered the heck out of it...

 

old chair awaiting facelift

 

Old table awaiting facelift

 
 
 
 

 

Save