Overbooked and Underpaid: Notes from a Yes-aholic

A Life Changing Program

 

Every once in a while you have an experience that profoundly changes something about how you view the world. The sort of thing that, once experienced, cannot be "un-experienced". 

I had such an experience in 1982 when I spent a summer studying in Europe. Once I viewed my home country from a distance, through the eyes of others, I could never quite look at the U.S.A. in exactly the same way I had before. 

I'm not saying I wanted to move to Europe or anything, I'm just saying I now saw some things very differently because I had new information.

I had another such experience on January 6th of this year.

While driving cross country I fired up my favorite new app (tune in radio) that lets me listen to my favorite programs from my favorite radio stations no matter where I am. As I frequently drive through patches of what I consider to be "quality radio wasteland" I am LOVING this app. (I have an older minivan so I have to patch my ipad through to my radio using a wireless transmitter device that somes with some static but you can't have everything.)

Which is how I came across the January 6th broadcast of "This American Life" episode 454 "Mr. Daisey And The Apple Factory".

Mike Daisey is a storyteller and this particular story is a doozy. 

And hearing his story changed my life.

I can't exactly tell you how yet because I am still processing the information from Mr. Daisey's story. I have a lot of conflicting emotions about it.

But now that I know these things I can never go back to "un-knowing" them. 

So I warn you, if you don't want your life changed, don't go listen to this program. 

Because you can never "un-listen" to it. And I promise you it will change you on some level - even if you don't want it to.

It's that powerful.

 

A note: you may have to buy the program in itunes for .99 if you are not listening on your desktop but, rather, on a mobile device. I promise you it's worth it.

Pic of the Week - The Last Bouquet

The snow finally arrived yesterday (and boy, did it arrive - over 8 inches). This was the last bouquet of flowers gathered from my garden at the unseasonably late date of December 5.

Tribute: Robert Bahr

So far 2012 is off to a pretty crappy start. We awoke to the news that John's stepfather, Robert Bahr,  had died New Year's Day.

Where do I begin.

Bob has been a fixture in our lives for over 30 years. When my husband bought me my engagement ring, I think the first thing we did was tell my parents and the second was to head on over to the Elks where Bob and my mother in law were out dancing and ringing in the New Year . (There's New Year's again...)

(Bob and Sue tearing up the dance floor at our nephew's wedding rehearsal dinner)

Professionally, Bob was a doctor - which was darned useful as we began having children, I probably called him at least once a month to ask him again what were the signs of a concussion.

But, beyond the obvious family stuff, I knew him mostly as a wood turner and golfer. Especially after he retired from medicine, he was either down in his shop working on a piece of wood or else out on the golf course. (Poor Bob, he played golf most days of his adult life and spent almost every one of them swearing, either at the ball, the clubs, or the scorecard - or me as I "13 putted")

As a wood worker he became legendary. While he personally would never admit that he was a true artist (to his dying day he said he didn't know what he was doing) he studied with and befriended almost every major woodturner in the world. If you meet a famous woodworker, ask them if they stayed at Bob Bahr's house and the answer will probably be yes.

Here are some photos of his wood:

Occasionally Bob would add paint and dye to his wood - this piece is maple burl under all that wild color.

He did a series of these carvings.

One of my favorites and a good representation of his sense of humor.

This I dubbed the "cy-clock" He made hundreds of clocks.

This piece is both painted and textured with a wood burner.

This piece is a replica of an earlier piece Bob had the poor judgement to sell - it was one of Sue's favorites and he had to make another.....

A wonderful Grandfather Clock from his earlier days.

A piece in progress.....

The finished piece.

Another smaller piece of the same type. In the last couple of years he made a series of these aiming to get ever smaller and more delicate.

One of the tiniest woodturnings I have ever seen.

Bob and his son - also a wood turner - had a competition to see who could make the smallest of these. I'm not sure whose are whose.

A fraction of work from a career of over 40 years.

I would like to include here a few words from my portion of the eulogy from his funeral.

"Bob was one of the most generous men I ever met. My friends and family have him to thank for nice toilet seats to sit on. During one of his visits to our home he took one look at the state of our toilet seats (which had come with the house), turned on his heel and went out to the store and bought me all new ones.

Another time, when I was in the hospital following the birth of our first child, Bob decided to vacuum my house for me. He turned on our sweeper, declared it a "piece of crap" and headed out and bought us a new one. (Upon later inspection, we found the bag on the old sweeper was just full.)

He always could make us laugh but his sense of humor was not for everyone. Once, during a visit to our apartment in Chicago, we went downtown to see an Andrew Wyeth exhibit. It was one of those ticketed events that had a certain start time. With some time to kill, we strolled up and down Michigan Avenue and checked out places like Tiffany and Gucci. While in the luggage section of Gucci, a woman approached the salesman and inquired wether or not there were any suitcases "without all these little G's all over them." Bob looked at me and said "Why doesn't the stupid woman go to Sears? Who buys a Gucci suitcase if they don't want everyone to know it's Gucci?!!" While I was embarrassed - I was pretty sure the woman heard him - I could not help laughing out loud.

He introduced my children to cake and donuts for breakfast, Powers Hamburgers and Foul Language (I'd still like to take that one up with him) He often teased them pretty badly but all my kids developed a thick skin and a razor wit to keep up with him and give back as good as they got. A skill that has served them well in the big, bad world.

I only remember Bob getting really mad at me one time. He was a rapid fan of Indiana University basketball (he was an IU alum) and, while he was visiting us and we all had to go out during the game, I promised I would use the VCR and tape it for him. I swore I did everything right. And I almost did. But when we returned, there was no recording of the game. Unbeknownst to me our VCR clock was incorrectly set to am instead of pm."

Bob was a big and bold person and he brought me out of my shell and taught me to "go for it" no matter what "it" was. When I started this blog, he was my biggest fan and the first person to put something in my "tip" jar. Imagine my delight when I got the paypal notice that I had a little extra money waiting for me.

For over 28 years he was a bedrock in all our lives - as long as he was around we knew we had someone in our corner who could help make everything turn out all right. He gave us a sense of security and brought us so much joy and our lives are truly richer for having known him.

Every Christmas Eve Bob had a big party and gave away the things he had made to his friends and family. You had to play the "dirty Santa" game where you steal things from other people to get them but everyone had a great time and there were almost never any sore losers.

You can see the joy of his guests (but I'm pretty sure my niece did not wind up with that clock by the end of the night)

So many breafasts and lunches with him at this counter.

With our daughter 

Pretty sure some teasing and bickering going on here.....

Bob and my daughter had a running thing with cheating each other out of the good recliner - Unfortunately, it is all hers now.

Good bye Bob - we will miss you more than you can know.

 

Am I Manic Depressive?

 

I know we don't call it manic depressive anymore - the correct term is now "bipolar". 

When does one cross the line from "crazy creative person" to "manic depressive" person?

Because I really don't think I am suffering from the classic M/D disorder that haunted Oscar Levant. I'm more like every creative person I've ever met - we tend to have our fingers in too many pies and a list of unfinished projects. It's not that we get fed up with the project in hand as much as a situation where we get another idea or inspiration at the same time and know that if we don't get it down on paper or launched in some way, we will lose the idea forever.

 So we hop from project to project and thing to thing because we have too many ideas to stick with only one. And we tend to have phases where we are really, really creative, burning up all kinds of inspired energy, followed by the need for some truly good long naps.

I once started a crewel embroidery while engaged to one gentleman, only to set the whole thing aside - hoop and all - for 4 years. I picked it up again  and finished it when I was married to John, the previous gentleman having become an ex-fiance. I didn't stop the project for any reason more complex than the fact that I started knitting instead. (Note: when you set an embroidery project aside for 4 years and don't take it off the hoop or protect it in any way, you get a finished piece that has a giant dirty ring across the zone where the hoop was.) 

I have done this a lot over the course of my life which is why there are so many things listed under the "hats I wear" tab. Some phases have lasted longer than others - Glass Blowing was a 4 year phase,  Ballet was a 12 year pursuit, Working in Cartooning is in its 6th year, and Harp has been a lifelong career of over 35 years. Various other hobbies like knitting have popped in and out for over 25 years. When it comes to things like knitting, tatting, and painting I tend to focus on one at a time for as many months as I feel so inclined.

I have enjoyed this sort of up and down existence when it comes to my various hobbies. 

But the latest phase - the one in which I spend a bajillion hours on the internet blogging and socially networking - is different. It's a lot harder to pick up and put down. Especially the blogs that are supposed to be supporting the business parts of my life - harp and cartooning. To get anything going of enough consequence to attract regular readers and eventually advertising it feels as it one has to be online ALL THE TIME.

And it's wearing me out.

And making me feel manic depressive.

This business of being in touch with everybody all the time starts out fun - it's nice to interact with people and see and hear what they are up to - but it then devolves into something overwhelming. I feel guilty if I step away - as if I am being a bad friend to those with whom I am in regular contact. But there is simply no way to keep track of all the pithy little comments my friends are making on twitter, facebook, google+ and various websites.

It's like a cocktail party that never, ever ends.

And it leaves me doing this bipolar sort of blitz socializing followed by periods of profound silence. 

So, maybe when it comes to the internet I am a little manic depressive....

How about you? 

The Death Of The Christmas Newsletter?

 

I have an unhappy relationship with holiday greetings. I have not managed to send out a Christmas card - or holiday card of any kind, actually, since 2000.

That was the year I lost my address book.

My first reaction, upon learning I had lost all those addresses should have been one of despair, right?

It was unbridled relief.

Relief at the thought that I had a legitmate excuse for not sending out holiday cards that year.

Why? Why such distast for a time honored tradition loved by millions of people? I mean, who doesn't like to get Christmas cards? And, I must confess here that I eagerly await all the cards other people send me. (Which is, of course, completely unfair and hypocritical.)

I burned out on Chrstimas cards because of the new tradition - probably started in the 1990's - of the CHRISTMAS NEWSLETTER. 

Before the Christmas newsletter became such a staple of our lives, it was easy to divide my cards up into two piles.

1) Close friends and family who I see regularly - these are folks who completely don't mind if we just sign our name to the card and

2) People we almost never see (we may not have actually seen them in years) - these folks you have to write a little note to catching them up on your life and inquiring about theirs.

And that was the extent of it. 

Pile number one always went very quickly and pile number two went a little more slowly but it wasn't that bad because the note was a politeness. A mere 5 sentence summary of the state of our lives - maybe a little more, maybe a little less. The note was NOT a blow by blow description of every illness or every acheivement.

Now that they have been around a while, Chrismas letters have evolved somewhat in that there are a few people who do them very well. They strike just the right balance of chattiness and catching you up without beating you over the head with accomplishments that make you feel like chopped liver or depressing the daylights out of you with their litany of sorrows.

But is this all, now, a moot point? 

Because now we have Facebook. And Twitter. And Google+. And Blogs. 

We are awash in each other's news. 

I can now find out the almost day to day activities of anyone I've chosen to interact with via social networking and the internet. 

Does this mean the impending death of the Christmas newsletter?

Boy, I hope so! 

I have a new address book and my two piles of cards ready to go.

 

Anti-Social Networking

 

I have a lot of issues with social networking.

1) I am basically anti social.

2) I read the book "1984" and HATED it. I thought it was probably one of the best and most important books ever written but hated it because it seemed possible.

3) I saw the movie "Minority Report". Pretty much the same deal as the Orwell book.

4) If I wanted to take over the world I probably wouldn't try to employ the tactics in 1984 or Minority Report via the government - no, I think I would create a cool social networking service and get everyone so addicted to it that they would voluntarily - happily, even - tell me everything I could ever want to know about them.

5) I am a middle aged person with a brain that processes change slowly. Which means that every time a social networking tool - or anything on my computer, for that fact - changes its format, it takes me weeks - nay, maybe even months - to figure the thing out all over again. By which time, it has changed again - possibly more than once - and I am, once more,  hopelessly out of the loop.

Which is a fancy way of saying almost none of the social networking tools make any sense to me.

Which is a subtle way of admitting that I am an not all that bright.

But I have had to come to grips with all of the above because, as a freelance artist, musician, and writer I have accepted how necessary social networking is to get the word out about whatever I am doing so that more people who are interested in my work can find it. 

And people who are not interested in my work can become interested in it. 

And, to be fair, I want to know what other people are doing creatively as well and help them spread the word about what they are doing.

But one problem I see with social media overall is that platforms originally designed just to connect people and facilitate their personal relationships are trying to evolve into marketing tools. And, while I can see the success of these sites on the relationship front,  I'm not seeing their value as much in marketing. They don't seem to help you find your audience as much as they help you find other people looking for an audience. I'm still waiting for the social networking equivalent of a publisher or record company.

That said, here are the social media tools I have tried and a little rundown of how well I feel they have worked.

So far I have embraced twitter, google+, stumbleupon and, to a tiny degree, facebook.

Twitter:

Twitter is my favorite place to find news and creative work by other people. I feel as though it is a little like a cross between a  newspaper, where I get to read interesting things, and a CB radio, where I can have conversations with multiple people at once. While I am not very adept at using it to share photos or videos, I love how easy it is to use overall. The format is simple and I am meeting cool people I might not meet otherwise.

Also, now that I have tweetdeck, I catch a lot more in the stream while I am working at other things on my computer. And, because the tweets are so short, they let me keep my main focus on my work.

As a tool to drive traffic to my websites twitter is only semi effective. I do not yet have enough followers to get the message to as many people as I would like. But it does have an impact. And, thanks to the practice of retweeting, I see all kinds of things I would not find just through the people I regularly follow and people who don't follow me can still "happen upon" me.

Stumbleupon:

There is a lot I do not understand about stumbleupon when it comes to following other people or interacting with them in any way. But as a tool to drive traffic to my websites it wins over twitter and facebook hands down. Any post that I share via stumbleupon tends to yield 10 to 50 times the page views of the other two.

Facebook:

I'm afraid I really don't like facebook for much of anything. Because of this, I do not have my own facebook page and simply have pages for my sites that are linked to my husband's account.

Beyond all the Orwellian stuff I've mentioned before is the fact that I primarily wish to use social networking to connect to people who are in my life currently and not to folks who are part of my past. But I don't want to be rude to the people from my past by not accepting their friend requests. And I don't want to accept friend requests in name only and then set up my account so that I never have to bother with those people. I feel as though that would be equally rude. So I just don't go there.

Plus, I find most of the actual template of facebook to be bewildering. I just can't seem to get the hang of how the site works. Especially since the powers that be at facebook seem to change something every week.

However, I cannot completely discount facebook as a tool to drive traffic to my sites. It tends to be roughly as effective as twitter for me.

Google+

I have only just joined this network and am still feeling my way around it. So far I find many aspects of it to be easier to use than facebook and I really like the idea of the different circles. It was easy to join. And it was easy for me to set up pages for my different sites.

My difficulties have come with finding other people on it. First of all - I can't simply access my twitter followers and transfer them over. Secondly, Not very many people seem to be using it yet. For this reason, I don't think it's going to be very useful as a traffic generator for a while. But I'm hoping to use it to meet some new people who like the things I like and hoping to have a more personal experience with some of my twitter followers than I have on twitter.

I also cannot figure out how to talk to anyone directly without using chat. I do think the facebook and twitter systems are much easier for just sending little messages to people who don't happen to be online at the same time you are. But then it could be that, once again, there is a perfectly good system there and I just am not seeing it because I'm so challenged at this sort of thing.

Another problem with google+ is that it isn't on any of my sharing buttons for my blogs. Which means I have to tweet something first and then use that tweet as a link. Which is time consuming. (I am sure there is a better way to do this but I don't yet know what it is. Feel free to enlighten me in the comments section.)

I mainly joined google+ as an alternative to facebook and thereby have avoided facebook for probably another 6 months. We'll see if it winds up being worth it.

Overall, I'm going to do my best with these tools and hope the benefits out weight the drawbacks.

And perhaps I'll even emerge from my cave a little and be less anti-social.

Which is probably the point.

 

Pic Of The Week: Surprised Bee

 

The cold weather took this bee by surprise - she is frozen to the flower. She disappeared a couple of days later - maybe eaten by a bird - I'd like to think she thawed out and flew away.

A Little Rant About Computers

I'm doing something I don't often do on the blog today and that is doubling up a post. By which I mean that I am stealing a post from one of my other blogs and posting it here because I feel it crosses over into my overbooked life. 

!^$#*^@%ing Computers!!

I tweeted this strip earlier today with the comment "This is my life!" and that is truer than would appear. Today's strip is based on what I like to call "The Upgrade Escher".

John and I have had a parade of Apple Computers.

There was this one:

And then this one:

And this: (John Calls this one the blue paperweight)

Followed by the white paperweight

Our first laptop:

John's current desktop:

My current desktop:

The surrogate laptop: (You can read about the demise of the other laptop here)

And now the current laptop. (Because using the ipad in place of the laptop - didn't so much work)

It all started with that first Mac John needed for his graphics business. In 1994, if you worked in graphics, the only computers with the software you would need were from Apple. 

And so we took out a loan (becuase, then, as now, they were crazy expensive) and bought one. We got to write it off for the business, but that only helps you not pay more money in April at tax time. It does not help you pay the rest of your bills at the time of purchase. And, while it was a good investment because it really was the best tool for John's business, it took a long time to pay it off. 

Which would not have been that big a deal if, as with our other major purchases like, oh say - a refrigerator - we could have counted on it to last 20 years. Or even 10. Hell, I would have settled for 5! 

But we very quickly found out that the land of computers does not work like that. The land of computers lives in what we like to call The Planned Obsolescence Zone. 

So, while every one of the computers listed above still turns on and technically "works", you can't actually use them in today's world. For one thing the first 4 can't talk to the internet anymore - heck, they can't even talk to my thumb drives. (Which leaves several important photos of yesteryear stranded on the blue imac because its disc drive is also broken and I cannot burn anything to CD.)

Which means constant upgrading. 

Forget the money issue - although that part of it does seriously tick me off - we cannot afford this business of having to buy another computer before we've paid off the last one (and don't suggest leasing - we don't have a big enough business to rate in that department and it's actually more expensive.)

No the real deep down thing that gets me absolutely stark raving insane with anger is the way, every time we upgrade - hardware OR software - THEY CHANGE EVERYTHING!!

My latest laptop doesn't even have the hard drive icon on the desktop anymore - a staple of macdom! Since I have purchased said laptop I have spent over 6 HOURS on the phone with tech support figuring out the new configurations. And that's with Snow Leopard. Heaven help me if I want to upgrade to Lion.

The worst is that dance you do (here's where the Escher bit comes in" where, now that you have upgraded thing 1, you have to upgrade thing 2, and then thing 3 and then thing 4 then things 5,6,7,8 and 9. 

I feel like I'm living in a Cat in the Hat Book!

Or - as in today's strip - a world where every week when I go to the grocery store, they've moved the damn bread again. 

Just to be cute.

!^$#*^@%ing Computers!!

When Good Warmers Go Bad

 

No, I am not inviting all of you into my bed. If you look closely at the above photo of my sheets you will see little brown spots. These are not bed bugs.

They are Lentils.

And not just any lentils. They are toasted lentils.

How did a bunch of toasted lentils get onto my sheets? They arrived when my homemade "bed buddy" exploded.

Minds out of the gutter, please. A "bed buddy" is a microwavable hot pack. And I have a collection of them that have saved my aching back and neck on more than one occasion. (You can read how to make your own here.)

I guess it's time to trot out the sewing machine and make some new ones.....

Dog Who Cried Wolf

We are the new, proud owners of an adorable sheltie puppy. He's fluffy and sweet and, of course, has already cemented his position as one of the family.

 
But he's a baby. And babies have all kinds of needs. And one of those needs is potty training. Especially since I don't plan to invest in doggie "diapers". ( I think that would be carrying the "baby" analogy just a little too far.)

 
Potty training children is tricky enough. (Which is probably why there are an amazing number of books and magazine articles out there dedicated to the simple art of not making a mess on the middle of the kitchen floor. Or in ones pants.)

When my children were small these were the top three potty training philosophies:

The Zen Approach - "You just have to relax and let nature take its course. He'll learn when the time is right".

The Dictatorial Approach - "We're not moving from this spot until you use the potty!"

And, my personal favorite, the Payola Approach - "Mommy will give you a treat if you put something in the potty...." (This approach works best when delivered in a high pitched, cajoling tone of voice, but don't make the mistake of showing the treat before you get the desired action.)

Once they grasp the purpose of the bathroom, children seem to learn quickly that the magic words to escape any unwanted activity, be it grocery shopping, a family gathering or church, are "I have to go potty".

My children were particularly talented at finding the most inopportune "we need to get to a bathroom right now" moment. In the checkout line, during "Happy Birthday", in the middle of the  sermon, you name it.

But at least the kid can say he/she needs to go potty. Even if they cannot crank out the whole sentence they can usually at least say potty.

Dogs can only whine. Or bark. Or jump on you. You get the idea.

And the big problem is that there is really no way to tell the " I have to piddle" whining from the whine that says "gimme some of your food!" or "I want to go outside and harass wildlife. Or simply " I want to go outside and lie down in the grass".

So, as with the child in the grocery store, you drop whatever you are doing and take the puppy out to do his business. 

And he stands there and looks at you. "Hey, it's really great to be outside and everything, but what are we doing here?" his expression seems to say.

So you say, "Go Potty!" and then, when that doesn't work, you say it again. Louder. (Because we all know that incomprehensible instructions get  clearer the more loudly we say them.)

And, if you're lucky, the dog figures out you want him to do SOMETHING and so he starts walking around and sniffing.

And you think to yourself "Ha! I knew saying it louder would work!"

And then he takes off after the cat. And runs under the car. And chases a squirrel. And eats grass. And sniffs some more. And then sits down and looks at you again.

At this point you might then try that "zen" thing and find something useful to do in the garden while you wait for the puppy to eventually simply need to go.

When that doesn't work, you can segue into bribery. (I recommend a pocket full of cheese pieces or bacon bits.)

Although more than half the time the result will simply be that the puppy will spend another 20 minutes or so faking you out with more sniffing.

So you give it up and take him back in the house.

Where he promptly pees on the floor.

And then wags his tail at you and expects a treat.

Which, being a soft hearted idiot, you wind up giving him.

Which begs the question who exactly is training who.

Don't answer that.